Tensions
As my academic catechesis moves forward, the language of religion becomes increasingly meaningless to me. I can dissect a given theological statement, find incoherencies in a group of statements or system, make inferences on the basis of beliefs A, B, and C, and delineate between the realms of philosophic speculation and doctrinal necessity. But I no longer have any idea what any of it has to do with anything. I know that it does mean something, but I’ve lost my grip on what that is. It’s a very strange phenomenon. In my first two years of school, studies and life were knotted too tightly, and the strain was, to be dramatic about it, unbearable. Now I’ve somehow managed to tear the two apart, and the lack of strain is equally unbearable. I guess I just need to find the necessary tension.
But first, I need to finish my meaningless thesis. Yes, I’m still going on about that. Now there’s an unbearable strain of a very different kind. Just one more week…